blankness, heavy behind my eyes.
i can feel thoughts struggling to form,
heading to the forefront, moving like molasses,
collecting into a pool and rising into a figure
i can almost make it out –
and it collapses onto itself, spills and separates.
how long have i been sitting here?
how long has it been since i last took a breath?
i try to inhale deeply but all my chest can manage is a weak heave.
i can hear people speaking around me,
their voices feel like the tide,
i can only hold on to a sentence or two before my mind blackens again.
each blink takes a week,
my foot is asleep and i forget how to wake it.
caffeine dependency is no joke.